On Slow Change, a Counsel from Friedrich von Hügel, and the Work of Waiting
A Note from Me
I’ve been training for two decades. And I am happy to report that I’ve changed.
I don’t rage as much as I used to. I’ve learned to listen better, even when I don’t agree. I’ve become gentler with my kids. I’ve become less narrow and more open minded. Some bad habits have fallen away, and some healthy ones have taken root. And underneath it all, there’s a deep current of trust in God’s ultimate goodness. That’s real. That’s transformation.
But if I’m honest, I haven’t changed as much as I expected. Not as fast as I hoped. In many ways, I’m still the same. I still check to see if people notice my accomplishments. I still accumulate more than I need. I still try to control people and outcomes. I still turn to food for comfort when pressure builds. And I still wonder:
Why is transformation taking so long?
I want to be more like Christ. I want to love like God loves. I’m tired of it feeling like an idea—I want to live it. But the pace is glacial. And that’s one of the marks of the Illuminative Way: waiting. There’s movement, to be sure, but no arrival.
From Chapter 7 of my first book Dwelling in Christ: Discover the Threefold Path of Spiritual Transformation
A Voice from the Christian Tradition
Friedrich von Hügel, writing to his niece, offered this encouragement about the long road of becoming:
“You want to grow in virtue, to serve God, to love Christ? Well, you will grow in and attain to these things if you will make them a slow and sure, an utterly real, a mountain step-plod and ascent, willing to have to camp for weeks or months in spiritual desolation, darkness and emptiness at different stages in your march and growth.”
A Question to Carry
Look back ten years and name one small change that has taken root inside you?
Keep walking,
—Jon
P.S. The audiobook of Dwelling in Christ just went up on Audible, narrated by me. If listening is how you take in books, you can pre-order it here ahead of the September 1 release.
